How to Embrace and Balance Cultural Differences in a relationship

Love is blind.

You may fall in love with someone from a different country, ethnicity, tradition, religion, or cultural background. While exploring the differences may seem exciting in the beginning, it can also lead to conflicts over time.

Some cultures have similar beliefs and traditions, while some are entirely contrasting ideals. If you and your partner have such glaring cultures, it’s essential to address the elephant in the room and deal with it.

When two partners with cultural differences are steadfast in following their own beliefs, there needs to be a balance of compromise and understanding.

Here are five recommendations to deal with cultural differences in your relationship.

5 Ways to Deal with Cultural Differences as a Couple

1. Acknowledge Your Cultural Differences

The very first step to set aside cultural differences and not let them affect your relationship is to acknowledge them. Understand that as much as your culture is essential to you, the same goes for your partner. Respect each other’s culture and give them the space to follow theirs.

Once you start to see the value your partner sees in their culture, you’ll come to appreciate the way it has shaped the person they’re today. 

2. Discuss the Common Aspects in Both Cultures

There can be differences in the racial, cultural, or religious practices of both partners. And when we come from such different backgrounds, we tend to notice the differences more than the similarities. 

So try to analyze the commonalities in both cultures — something that you can do together.

Sometimes, there can be a few cultural activities or beliefs you agree with or love to participate in from your partner’s culture. So, address and highlight those common aspects and the things you like about each other’s culture. This will show each other how much they value their partner and their beliefs.

3. Create an Open Dialogue About Following Cultural Beliefs

A relationship with someone of a different origin or faith only works when you’re ready to accept and respect their culture. And it all starts with having an open conversation.

Be open about how important your culture or religion is to you, how it has influenced you in your personal life, and its role in keeping you grounded and connected. Similarly, discuss with your partner about how their culture affects them and how much it means to them.

4. Discuss the Culture of Kids

Talking about cultural beliefs to follow in the future, you need to be clear on managing these differences with kids.

If you think it’s too early in your relationship to talk about kids, enquire about how they want to go forward in the future. Have an open-ended conversation about their flexibility in exploring other cultures.

If you’re engaged or married, then it’s high time you have this conversation about the kid’s cultural beliefs. 

What’s the culture that you’ll teach the kids?

What religious beliefs do you want to impart to the kids?

How open is your partner to having your kids learn your culture?

What do you think about allowing the kids to follow both cultures and letting them choose one when they’re mature enough?

You need to have this conversation when you’re getting serious in your relationship — especially when you are keen on wanting your kids to know your culture.

5. Accept the Time for Finding the Common Ground

Initially, when both partners are religious and very attached to their cultures, the initial conversations can be tricky.

Give time for each other to dwell on the conversations, understand where you come from and reach a common ground where each other is free to follow their beliefs as they feel.

It’s okay if your partner takes more time than you. Accept that it’s a process to find a middle ground. But at the end of the day, you want a relationship with compromises on both sides to manage cultural differences.

For example, if your partner wants to fast on a specific day or wouldn’t consume a particular ingredient, make allowances and compromise for them. Similarly, if you want to visit your place of worship, you can ask your partner to take charge of the kids on that day.

Making a relationship work with cultural differences is all about the compromises we make. When two people are so in love with each other, we need to make space for each other to hold on to their religious beliefs and cultural traditions — and most of all, respect them for it.

Lakshmi Padmanaban

Lakshmi Padmanaban is a freelance writer for the past 5 years writing for startups and SMBs. She married her long-time love after 8 long years and has since then been writing about love, relationship, and sexual wellness. She's quite passionate about issues of toxic relationships, sexual stigma, and patriarchy and grabs every chance she can to smash them.

https://lakshmipadmanaban.com/
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