Balancing Love and Money: Financial Check-ins for Couples

No matter how in love you and your partner are, there are some topics that are still awkward to broach. For some couples, talking about money is harder than talking about other taboo subjects, like death or sex. Although it can sometimes be hard to talk about finances, you and your partner need to do so if you want to have a healthy relationship. Money matters, so we're going to go over some information on financial check-ins for couples to balance love and money. When you put in the work and start discussing money with your partner, you'll have a stronger relationship because of it.  

What Is a Relationship Check-In and Why Is It Important?

Put simply, relationship check-ins are "meetings" you have with your partner—sessions where you can both check in with each other. While relationship check-ins might be utilized to get a general vibe for how your relationship is going, they can also be utilized for more specific purposes. Some couples enjoy having financial check-ins because they help cultivate mutual understanding and financial stability within the relationship.

A jar of money, a calculator and tablet on a coffee table with a couple planning their finances in the background.

Discussing finances as a couple makes your relationship stronger.

The Benefits of Regular Financial Relationship Check-Ins for Couples

You're more familiar with relationship check-ins, so let's talk more about why financial check-ins are so crucial. Here are some reasons couples benefit from financial check-ins:

They Reduce Stress: When there are financial issues that need to be addressed in your relationship, it's likely that each partner will feel some sort of stress. Talking about finances with your partner takes some stress off you both, because you can lean on each other and work toward achieving your financial goals.

You Can Work on Problem Solving: Couples thrive when they're able to work through problems together. When you have regular financial check-ins, you and your partner can learn how to solve problems more efficiently.

Wealth-Building Can Happen: At the end of the day, financial check-ins are important because they are really practical. You can build wealth with your partner when you have regular talks about finances.

Talking about Money Will Become Less Taboo: Sometimes, there are unspoken "off-limits" topics between you and your partner. Talking about finances in the open takes the stigma away from the topic, which will make it easier for you to have hard conversations with your partner in the future.  

Demonstrating Proactivity in Your Relationship and Finances

You shouldn't wait until your finances are too far gone to have a conversation about money. It's important that you and your partner are proactive—the sooner you talk about money, the better. When you put off talking about finances, you risk your relationship—and your financial situation—deteriorating quickly!

A black couple having a discussion while seated on a sofa in a living room

Couples benefit from regular financial check-ins.

Step-by-Step Guide: How to Set Up Financial Relationship Check-Ins for Couples

It can be daunting to start having financial check-ins with your partner. So, to make things a little bit easier for you, we are going to go over a step-by-step guide that will explain how to approach your financial check-in. Here's how to facilitate a financial relationship check-in:

  1. Find a Time That Works for Both Parties: You've got to find a time that works for both partners, and you have to ensure that there aren't any other stressful events happening around the time of your financial check-in. This ensures that both of you have clear heads during your meeting.

  2. Begin by Establishing Some Ground Rules: Set the record straight (in a kind way) before you start your meeting. Make sure both partners know that this check-in is about having an open conversation.No one should be made to feel inferior or "bad with money." You should start your check-in knowing that this is a loving conversation that is meant to help you both grow.

  3. Talk and Work to Set Attainable Goals: Talk about your finances with your partner and work to set attainable goals. Don't dwell on goals that are unrealistic; instead, take a look at your financial information and set goals you can achieve together.

  4. Ensure There Are No Lingering Hard Feelings: Before you end your financial check-in, give each other the space to express any lingering hard feelings. Although it's best if there are none at the end of the meeting, you want to make sure no one leaves the check-in upset.

  5. Agree That You'll Have Another Check-In Soon: Financial check-ins are best if they're frequent, so talk to your partner about when they want to have another check-in. Based on your goals and how your first financial check-in went, this date will vary.

Smiling couple give each other a high five after budgeting their finances in the kitchen table

You can balance love and money and have a fulfilling relationship.

10 Questions to Ask to Start the Conversation

If you and your partner are just starting out and having your first relationship check-in, you might not know what to say at first. Talking about money can be scary, but it doesn't have to be when you have some conversation starters. These 10 questions are great for financial relationship check-ins.

  1. Where would you like our finances to be in 10 years?

  2. What is one financial mistake we've made in the past, and how do we avoid making it again?

  3. Are there expenses we can cut out so that we can save more?

  4. What would a reasonable budget look like for our lifestyle?

  5. Is it reasonable for us to save for a vacation or a new car (or whatever other luxury you and your partner are eyeing)?

  6. Is it likely our salaries will change in the next five years? If so, how will our financial state change?

  7. Do we have an emergency fund set-up, and if we don't, how can we alter our budget to create one?

  8. If something goes wrong financially, how can we best support each other? Do you have a history of financial trauma that triggers you? 

  9. What is one financial goal you have for our family?

  10. In which area are we spending too much?

Love Deeper and Live With Financial Freedom, Choose Relationship Check-In Conversation Cards

Whatever season of your relationship you're in, you can benefit from talking about finances with your partner. To make talking about finances even more seamless, check out our Relationship Check-In Conversation Cards. Our cards can make hard conversations more approachable, so purchase them, today!

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